Wednesday 28 February 2018

Black Panther (4½ Stars)


This is it. This is the film people have been raving about all year. Judging by its initial performance it could be the most successful film of the year.

It's a great film, though not the best in the ongoing Marvel Cinematic Universe series. I think that "Captain America: Civil War" was a better film. Nevertheless, I can understand its popularity. It's the right film at the right time. In recent films it's been claimed that Hollywood films aren't black enough, i.e. they don't have enough black actors. In "Black Panther" almost every actor is black. Martin Freeman and Andy Serkis stand out as notable exceptions.

It's also a very empowering film for black people. The fictional central African kingdom of Wakanda is presented as the technologically most advanced country on Earth.

The film impresses in the way it combines futuristic technology with African culture. The tribal dances and rituals are a realistic mixture of what's practised in other African countries. The only unrealistic element is the way that women have leading positions in Wakanda, but if Wakanda is an advanced country it's logical that it's developed beyond the patriarchal societies that surround it.

This is the last film before "Infinity War", the climax of all the MCU films so far. Judging by the trailer T'Challa, the Black Panther, will play an important part. Sadly, I don't expect that "Infinity War" will live up to the comics on which it's based. Too much has been swapped and changed. But I'll give it a chance. It will probably be as good as any film based on comics can be.

Biutiful (1 Star)


I don't like films about cancer. I don't like films about any sort of illness. Those are topics I can talk about, but I don't want to watch them for entertainment.

Tuesday 27 February 2018

Galaxy Quest (4½ Stars)


It's difficult to write something about this film that can do it justice. Let me just describe the premise, so that if you belong to the 0.1% of the world's population who hasn't yet seen it you'll want to run out and buy it.

There was a highly successful television series called Galaxy Quest. After it was cancelled none of the actors had much success, so they remained known for their Galaxy Quest roles. After 18 years they're still travelling from one science fiction convention to another, wearing their old costumes and repeating their old catchphrases to adoring audiences full of sci-fi geeks. They're getting sick of it, but as has-beens it's the only way they can make any money. The only exception is Jason Nesmith, the former ship's captain and main star of the TV series. He loves the adulation of the fans at the conventions, which alienates him from his co-stars.

Then they're approached by four people who look like typical cosplayers, but they're beings from the planet Thermia. They've watched the television episodes, including the reruns, for the last 20 years. The Thermians don't have a concept of fiction being used as entertainment, so they think it was recordings of things that really happened. They've come to Earth to ask Jason and his crew to save their planet.


A plot like that might fall flat on its face in the wrong hands, but look who's in the film: Sigourney Weaver, Sam Rockwell and the late, great Alan Rickman!

The film is a parody of Star Trek. Maybe the word parody is too strong. There isn't a one-to-one relationship between Star Trek and the Galaxy Quest crew, apart from Jason Nesmith himself, who's easy to recognise. The others are composite characters who have traits of different characters from the original Star Trek series and The Next Generation.

Admittedly, you'll appreciate this film most if you're a Star Trek fan or are at least well acquainted with it, but I still think that anyone will enjoy the humour.

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Marvel Years 03.05 - May 1963


Until now I've only been reading the super-hero comics published by Marvel in the 1960's. I've skipped the cowboy stories, the romance stories and the anthology stories, even though most of them were written by Stan Lee and Larry Lieber. I decided to add "Sgt. Fury and his Howling Commados" to my reading list for three reasons. The main reason is that Nick Fury and several of his Howling Commandos later appeared as members of SHIELD, 20 years later in the Marvel chronology. The second reason is that the first 41 issues of this comic series have been praised as the best war comics ever written. The third reason is quite simply that I've never read them before.

According to Stan Lee, the comic's title is the result of a bet he made with Marvel's publisher Martin Goodman. Stan bet that he could write a comic with Jack Kirby that sold well even though it had the worst title he could think up. As a publisher with bills to pay I would never have taken such a risk, but Martin allowed Stan to write a comic with this ridiculous title and it was a smash hit.

Sgt. Fury and his Howling Commandos #1

Title(s): Sgt. Fury and his Howling Commandos
Seven against the Nazis

Writer: Stan Lee
Artist: Jack Kirby

Villain: Adolf Hitler


This is a single story split into two parts that have been given individual titles. The Howling Commandos are based in England. They travel to France to rescue a resistance leader who knows the exact date of the D-Day attack. The comic's last panel takes place on D-Day itself, 6th June 1944.


This is the first depiction of Adolf Hitler in Marvel Comics in the 1960's. It can be argued that he's Marvel's most evil villain.

There's a two page feature introducing the Howling Commandos which I've decided to reproduce in full. Many of the comic pages that I reproduce in my Marvel Years reviews are copyrighted. I do this to encourage my readers to buy the comics, either the reprint editions or the online versions from Marvel.com. If any of the copyright holders object to individual images, please read my disclaimer at the bottom of this page.



My original intention was to add the Sgt. Fury comic series to my regular reading list, but I've now changed my mind because I consider it non-canon, with the possible exception of the first issue. Here is an explanation of my decision:

In Sgt. Fury #1 the Howling Commandos are presented. There are seven of them, including Nick Fury himself. This story takes place in June 1944.

In Sgt. Fury #4 Jonathan Juniper is killed, reducing the number of Howling Commandos to six.

In Sgt. Fury #6 the Howling Commandos fight Erwin Rommel in Africa. This must have taken place before Rommel left Africa in March 1943, but Jonathan Juniper is already dead.

I would have no problem with the stories being printed in a non-chronological order, i.e. late war stories being published before early war stories. What disturbs me is the contradiction of characters being dead in 1943 but alive again in 1944. Despite the quality of the Sgt. Fury stories I've classified the series as non-canon.




Fantastic Four #14

Title: Sub-Mariner and the Merciless Puppet Master

Writer: Stan Lee
Artist: Jack Kirby

Villain: Puppet Master, Sub-Mariner

Regulars: Alicia Masters


This isn't exactly a super-villain team-up story. The Puppet Master takes control of Sub-Mariner to make him attack the Fantastic Four. What he doesn't reckon with is Sub-Mariner's love for Susan Storm, which eventually breaks the control. Love is stronger than all. After the battle we see the three participants in the tragic love triangle standing together.


This issue shows yet another new power of the Human Torch. He can fly in a spiral to create a warm air funnel that sucks people through, sucking them in and carrying them to another place. Is this scientifically possible? I have my doubts.






Amazing Spider-Man #2

Title: Duel to the Death with the Vulture

Writer: Stan Lee
Artist: Steve Ditko

Villain: Vulture

Regulars: Aunt May, J. Jonah Jameson, Flash Thompson, Liz Allan (unnamed)


This comic contains two stories. In the first story it starts to become clearer how Peter Parker's so-called spider sense works. It warns him about danger, but it also acts as a type of radar to detect evil villains.


This story shows Peter Parker become a free lance photographer for the Daily Bugle. We also become acquainted with NOW magazine, a full colour magazine published by the Daily Bugle. It's not clear whether it's published weekly or monthly, but I assume the former. In future issues this magazine is rarely mentioned (only another twice in comics written by Stan Lee, according to the Marvel Database).




Title: The Uncanny Threat of the Terrible Tinkerer

Writer: Stan Lee
Artist: Steve Ditko

Villain: Aliens

Regulars: Flash Thompson, Liz Allan (unnamed)


According to the comic's title the main villain is called the Tinkerer, but he's actually just one member of an alien race.

This story is significant for being the first time that Spider-Man began to use his famous comic banter. While fighting with villains he continually tells jokes, as if he's not taking the fights seriously.




Tales to Astonish #43

Title: The Astonishing Ant-Man versus the Mad Master of Time

Writer: Stan Lee, Larry Lieber
Artist: Don Heck

Villain: Time-Master


This issue also contains two short anthology stories.




Journey into Mystery #92

Title: The Day Loki Stole Thor's Magic Hammer

Writer: Stan Lee, Robert Bernstein
Artist: Joe Sinnott

Regulars: Jane Foster, Odin, Heimdall

Villain: Loki

This issue contains the only appearance of the Goddess Fricka, Odin's wife. In the following stories Odin has no wife, and there's no explanation what happened to Thor's mother. In later years other authors tried to connect her with the Goddess Freyja. For me that's non-canon.

This issue also contains three short anthology stories.




Tales of Suspense #41

Title: The Stronghold of Doctor Strange

Writer: Stan Lee, Robert Bernstein
Artist: Jack Kirby

Villain: Doctor Strange


The Doctor Strange in this comic is a scientific genius who has nothing to do with the master of the mystic arts who will first appear in Strange Tales two months from now. Or does he? If you look at the cover you'll see a strong similarity in the cape and the cowl. Did Steve Ditko deliberately imitate Jack Kirby's design? It's possible.

This issue also contains two short anthology stories.




Strange Tales #108

Title: The Painter of a Thousand Perils

Writer: Stan Lee, Robert Bernstein
Artist: Jack Kirby

Villain: The Painter (Wilhelm Van Vile)


The Fantastic Four do not appear in this issue. The people who attack the Human Torch are only painted replicas.

This issue also contains three short anthology stories.



Other comics published this month:

Millie the Model #114 (Stan Lee, Stan Goldberg)
Love Romances #105 (Stan Lee, various)
Kid Colt Outlaw #110 (Stan Lee, Jack Keller)
Two Gun Kid #63 (Stan Lee, Dick Ayers)
Gunsmoke Western #76 (Stan Lee, various)

Monday 26 February 2018

Liebesgrüße aus der Lederhose 7 (3 Stars)


"Tell me the truth: did you pee on the floor and wipe it up with my towel?"

If you buy the German DVD box set you'll find seven films in the "Greetings from the Lederhose" collection. However, there were only five films. This last two films have nothing to do with any of the previous films. The sixth film at least had a rural mountain setting to make it look similar to the first five films, but the seventh film takes place in Bavaria's capital city, Munich. The only Lederhosen that we see are are musicians performing at a wedding. This wedding scene has nothing to do with the rest of the film, so it looks like it was slotted in so that the director could say, "Look! There are the Lederhosen you paid to see!"

Even the comedy is of a different tenor to all of the preceding six films. The Lederhosen films were all sex farces, with horny women grabbing any men in sight. This film is about the love problems of one married couple, Fridolin and Verena (renamed Dorina in the English dubbing). This isn't a Lederhosen film. Not even close.

Having said that, Fridolin is played by the Israeli superstar Zachi Noy. Any film that he appears in is worth checking out. I consider him to be magnificent, even if he can be accused of always playing himself. It's true, he always plays the same man with an innocent charm that attracts women even though he's small and fat. He's always a perfect gentleman who puts women on a pedestal. I had to smile when I saw him bringing his wife breakfast in bed. That's what he does.


The plot is simple. Fridolin has been married to Verena, a glamorous pop star, for three years. She's been having an affair with Freddy, a music producer in Munich. She doesn't want to keep it secret any more, so she suggests to Fridolin that they have an open marriage. She assumes that only she would profit from it, because no other woman would want her husband. Fridolin doesn't know what to do, so he turns to his best friend, Freddy, for advice. Yes, that's the same Freddy who's sleeping with his wife! Freddy finds Verena too clingy, because she's only one of his many lovers, so he gives Fridolin advice how to get her back. Fridolin should hire a prostitute to move in with him for a few days, pretending to be his lover, which will make Verena jealous.

The trouble is that the prostitute falls in love with Fridolin. Every woman wants a man who brings her breakfast in bed.


The film's only positive features are Zachi Noy's acting and the abundance of bare breasts. The plot isn't bad in itself, but it's poorly filmed. The last 15 minutes, the holiday in Africa, has no relevance to the rest of the film. It's obvious that it was tagged on because the director realised that the film was too short and needed padding. The same is true of various irrelevant scenes during the film. There's a funeral scene where we aren't even told who died. The director Gunter made many good erotic comedies from 1972 to 1984, but after returning from a six-year retirement he seems to have lost his skill.

Though best known in Germany for his films, he's recently become notorious for his bad habits. Last year he took part in Germany's "Celebrity Big Brother". He must have forgotten the cameras were watching him. He couldn't get to the toilet fast enough, so he peed in the shower. As if this weren't bad enough, some of it missed the shower and went on the floor. Zachi used the towel of his housemate Sarah Knappik to clean the floor, all on live television. You can still find the video online.


Poor Zachi couldn't wait.


This shows you how bad Zachi's aim was. Click on the photo to see an uncensored version if you want to know why all the women love Zachi.

Hey, wait! The show has a shower cam? Maybe I should be watching it!


Sarah challenges Zachi the next day. Shouldn't she pick on someone her own size?

Bibi & Tina: Tohuwabohu Total (3½ Stars)


This is the fourth film in the musical comedy series about the teenage witch Bibi Blocksberg and her best friend Tina Martin. The trailer announced that it would be the last film, so I expected that it would somehow tie up loose ends from the previous three parts. Not at all. This is a completely different film in essence and style. Whereas the first three films were fantasy stories for teenage girls, far detached from the real world, "Tohuwabohu Total" is a socially critical film.

Castle Falkenstein is in need of renovation. The Count has appointed a building company led by Dirk Trumpf to do the work. The naive Count wasn't careful what he signed. Trumpf has been given control of the castle, and his main priority is to build a big wall around the castle to stop foreigners getting in.


While Bibi and Tina are out riding they meet a young Syrian boy who has just arrived in Germany as a refugee without his family. A few days later he confesses that he's really a girl. Come on, just look at that photo! How can anyone be stupid enough to believe that's a boy? I've never had problems telling the difference. The girl, whose name is Adea, isn't even from Syria. She's fled to Germany on foot from Albania to get away from a forced marriage.

In the meantime they meet two teenage boys from Syria called Sinan and Karim. They were in a refugee home in Bavaria, but they didn't like it because it was in the remote countryside. They ran away from the home, hoping to find a big city. They don't like Adea because she's a fake refugee. They say that only Syrians should come to Germany. They tell her to return to Albania to get married, because it's a woman's duty to get married and she should obey her father.

Adea's uncle arrives in Germany with his two sons to look for her. The uncle wants to grab her and return home, but the boys want to stay in Germany to get rich. They ask for help from another cousin who fled to Germany as a refugee a year ago. He only went to Germany because he was gay and wanted to live in a country where homosexuality is acceptable, but he has to keep that secret from his relatives.

I can't detect a message in all of these problems. No answers are given. I think that the writer/director Detlev Buck just wants the viewers to know that Germany's refugee crisis isn't as simple as it seems, and the viewers should make up their own minds. Opponents of refugees want to kick everyone out, while supporters of refugees want to accept everyone. Both groups are wrong. Rather than making sweeping generalisations like the current American president, every refugee should be judged individually on a case by case base. Some refugees are fleeing from war zones. Some come from peaceful countries, but they're being persecuted because of their religion or sexuality. Some come from other countries to enjoy Germany's prosperity. It's hard work to examine every single person individually, but it's the only way to be fair to everyone.

This is the first film in the series to feature a car chase, and it's very original. If something similar has already been filmed I don't know it. There's a five-minute chase scene across corn fields in which two cars chase two horses. The cars are faster, but the horses can manoeuvre better. It's exciting and well filmed.


Why does the film series have to end now? Last year this was the ninth most successful film in Germany at the box offices. Fans are already clamouring for a fifth film. The problem is obvious. The two lead actresses, Lina Larissa Strahl (Bibi) and Lisa-Marie Koroll (Tina) were 19 when they made the film, and they're 20 now. It's getting increasingly difficult to take them seriously as 13-year-olds. Makeup can only go so far.

The director has suggested that he can make a fifth film with new actresses. It works for James Bond, so why not for Bibi and Tina? He just needs to be careful with the casting. However well Lina and Lisa-Marie played their roles, they were already too old when they were picked. They were both 16 when the first film was made, which is on the borderline for playing 13-year-old characters. When a film was made about Bibi Blocksberg in 2002 the lead actress was only 12 years old. It's a shame that only one sequel was made, because she was young enough to grow into the role, or rather remain grounded in the role. We can't have a development like Daniel Radcliffe in the course of the Harry Potter films, because Bibi Blocksberg is forever 13.


On the other hand, look at this photo that was taken after the film's release, when the two actresses were six months older than in the film. Even dressed in their normal clothes they still look young. They don't look like they're 13, but they definitely don't look like they're 19. Somewhere in the middle. Maybe they can return for just one more film before they retire. The fans will be happy.

Click here for the official music video for "Tohuwabohu Total".

Sunday 25 February 2018

Bibi & Tina: Girls against Boys (3 Stars)


This is the third film in the musical comedy series about the teenage witch Bibi Blocksberg and her best friend Tina Martin. The girls are away from home on a camping holiday, so they're surrounded by a lot more young people than usual. The location isn't named, but it was filmed in Brandenburg.

The action starts when Bibi asks to take part in a rugby match. Isn't rugby the most masculine of all sports? The boys laugh at her for taking part, but their laughter soon fades away. She's the fastest runner on the pitch, and she scores three tries in three minutes, leading her team to victory.

The boys can't live this down, so an adventure game is arranged to determine who's better, girls or boys. The boys and girls are divided into teams of three each. They have to follow clues and search for plastic stars hidden in the woods. The preliminary rounds are a process of elimination; a team only has to find one star to progress to the next round. In the final round the winner is the team that finds the most stars.

There are 12 teams. Each team is made up of three boys or three girls. The only exception is Bibi and Tina's team. The third member of their team is a French boy called Francois. For me that's the film's weakest feature. They should have had another girl with them, to make it a pure girls versus boys event. After all, we know before the game starts that Bibi and Tina will win, so why does a boy have to win with them? It doesn't make sense.


Down in the mud looking up at Bibi and Tina. This is the way most of the boys will remember their opponents.


Don't worry, boys. If you're not good enough for the girls you can still find a gorilla who loves you.


Do the boys really think they have a chance with these beauties? Dream on!


At least one boy finds love, but it's on the girl's terms. He has to shut up and enjoy it.

Click here to see the film's official music video, which is an excerpt from the film itself. It's silly, but somehow I like it.

Saturday 24 February 2018

Jewtopia (3 Stars)


Christian O'Connell had a Jewish girlfriend while he was at university. On graduation day she dumped him, giving the reason that at university she could do whatever she wanted, but back home she had to be a good girl. For her being a good girl meant only dating Jewish boys.

Ten years later Christian is working as a plumber -- is that the only job he could get with his degree? -- and he still hasn't got over her. He hasn't had a girlfriend since university. That's sad. When he goes on hunting trips with his family his brothers accuse him of being gay.


Finally he meets the most beautiful girl he's ever seen, Alison Marx, played by Jennifer Love Hewitt. There's only one problem. She's a Jew. He doesn't want to lose her, so he introduces himself as Avi Rosenberg. The name isn't enough, so he asks one of his childhood friends to teach him how to convince her he's a Jew.

The first and most important thing is that he should never tell Alison he's a plumber. That's not something a Jew would ever do. He has to be a doctor, a lawyer or a banker. Christian decides to tell Alison he's a surgeon. That's a good choice, because she can never ask to visit him at work.

Christian has to learn a dozen Yiddish words that he can casually drop into conversation. Then there's the matter of etiquette. Whenever he goes to a restaurant he has to complain; he should tell the waiter he wants a better table and the music is too loud. However good the food is, he should say it doesn't taste right. Then he should tell the waiter that the price is too high for what he's been given. That's what Jews do.

There's one more problem. Alison isn't just any Jewish girl, she's a rabbi's daughter. Christian will need more than 12 words of Yiddish to prove that he's a real Jew.


This is a delightfully irreverent film, totally lacking in political correctness. Before you complain about racism remember that the Jews and the English have a common quality: they're able to laugh at themselves. That's something Americans have difficulty with, and Germans can never laugh at themselves.

When I was 17 I had a Jewish girlfriend. Her name was Zena Grinbergs (sic). It wasn't quite as bad as in the film. Her parents tolerated me. Her father was a senior executive at a coal mine. I suppose that's a barely acceptable job for a Jew. She was 15, still a virgin, and she promised me we could have sex when she turned 16. I was willing to wait, but we never got that far. We split up after two months. That was the typical length of my relationships at that age. I don't think she broke up with me because of my race. Her next boyfriend was Catholic.

For Zena it wasn't just a matter of her race. It was also her cultural background. Her family was from Latvia and had come to England after the Second World War. A few years later she met a Latvian boy called Janis, possibly a Jew, and married him. After that I lost touch with her.

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The Day of the Beast (5 Stars)


Angel Berriartua is a Catholic theology professor. After spending 25 years studying the last book of the Bible, the Apocalypse, he discovers that the Antichrist will be born on 25th December 1995 in Madrid. There are only two problems. First, it's already 23rd December, so he only has two days to intervene. Second, he doesn't have an exact address, and Madrid is a large city.

That's a typical plot for an end of days film, of which dozens have already been made, but this film is directed by Alex de la Iglesia, so we know we can expect something that verges on insanity.

Angel decides that the only way to find the exact address is to speak to the Devil himself. He has to abandon his faith and become a Satanist. On arriving in Madrid Angel makes friends with a death metal fan. Together they kidnap Cavan, the host of  an occult television show, and they demand that he summon the Devil for them. Cavan confesses to being a charlatan who just says what the public expects to hear, but he's persuaded that Angel is genuine, so he offers to help him.


The end of the world has never been so much fun. Despite the absurd comedy, the film avoids being sacrilegious.

"Day of the Beast" was released in America and England on DVD, but is now out of print. The Spanish Blu-ray is available from Amazon.es and contains English subtitles.

Friday 23 February 2018

Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance (3½ Stars)


After looking at the Blu-ray cover of the film I was curious about the single word "Brilliant" quoted from the Daily Star. I consider it one of Marvel's weakest films, so I couldn't believe someone would really sum up the film like that, so I searched for the review online. It was written by Alan Frank on 17th February 2012, and I've taken the liberty of quoting the full review below. The word "Brilliant" is taken slightly out of context, since it refers to the directors, not the film itself, but overall the review is good. Mr. Frank liked it, even though he only rated it 7/10.

Interestingly, on his personal blog, published on the same date, Alan Frank only rated it 6/10. The text on his blog is roughly the same, but the paragraph containing the word "brilliant" is missing. Did the Daily Star change the review to make the film sound better?

Not happy with this, I did some research into Alan Frank. I'd never heard of him before, but he's evidently a man who is well known as a film critic who has specialised in reviewing horror films for the last 40 years. One of my fellow bloggers calls him "the industry's most easily-pleased film critic". That's not a bad thing. I'm also easily pleased. Whenever I watch a film for the first time and feel disappointed I try to look for its positive features.

Alan Frank

Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance, Alan Frank, 17th February 2012

“I’m the guy who made the deal with the Devil,” he says, adding: “The darkness inside me only gets stronger”.

And he proves it with the mounting flaming body count that piles up when he starts blazing.

Too many sequels suck. Happily this explosion of action and startling special effects does just what it says on the tin without trying to be trendy or clever.

The hot stuff begins when monk Idris Elba persuades Cage to save a young boy from Satan himself.

Cage agrees, hoping to undo his pact with the Devil by doing a good deed and the screen fills up with freshly barbecued evil-doers.

It’s action, action and action all the way, with just a few (very few!) pauses for thought and for the plot to kick in.

Otherwise it’s multiple mayhem, gunplay, hair-raising road chases and Cage relentlessly roasting all the villains he can.

It would be useful to know his character in the cold weather we’ve just had since he can transform himself into a white-hot killer skeleton that shoots flames that would melt an iceberg in an instant.

But those same shooting flames also make him lethal.

Writer/directors Mark Neveldine and Brian Taylor, who cracked out Crank, definitely do the thrilling business here.

They are brilliant at showcasing Cage’s fiery punisher whilst also letting Satanic Ciaran Hinds, Elba and company have their flings.

VERDICT: 7/10

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